I'm Starting With the Man in the Mirror

No, the title isn't meant to be a lead-in to any deep and meaningful changes I plan on making to myself. I've just had that Michael Jackson song stuck in my head for the past 15 minutes and wanted to share.
It's always funny to me the little things that I notice from living with Hayley. Most of it stems from my tendency for habits and routines. Occasionally it's from my minorly OCD things. This one occurred to me as I was telling Hayley what I wanted from the grocery store. After years of doing my own shopping and shopping only for me, I've developed specific tastes for certain items. For instance I only eat Fuji apples; preferably organic fujis. I've found a brand of bread that I like best. I've also developed short-hand on my own shopping list. (Yes, I use a list cause I've proven many many times that I'm incapable of remembering everything I want without it.) So I can just write "lunch" and I know exactly what 4 things that means. Bread, deli meat, apples, bananas. Other things I want to check out before I get them. If the peaches are good I get a few; if not I get extra apples.
So while I know all of these things it's tough to quickly pass on this knowledge to Hayley on a week to week basis. So anytime I try to make a list for her, it's full of all these weird verbal directions. Most of which she doesn't understand. "Only get peaches if they're ripe and a good weight for their size." If you don't normally buy fruit, how the hell do you know what that means? "Get either buffalo chicken or regular roast beef from the deli. Whatever you think I'd like better." Right, that's real helpful. While that is how I do it, that doesn't help her very much.
Wow, could this be any more boring? This is why I don't normally do this on a lazy Saturday afternoon. But I'm in the midst of my Blackhawks-Cubs double header on TV and figured it was a good time. Naturally the Hawks just lost to the Bruins in a tough game, so hopefully the Cubs can pick me up here.
In more car news, I noticed today that my car antenna was broken off at some point. I'm not sure exactly when. I very rarely use the FM tuner, and I still get decent reception in town without it, so it's hard to say. But it was clearly broken off, not just unscrewed. I did glue it on after I had a previous one stolen, so that's not surprising. The best I can figure is that it snapped off the other day as I was pushing a foot of wet, heavy snow off of my hood. Of course I'm hoping it met a better end than that. My best-case scenario is that it was snapped off of my car while it was sitting outside either DirectTire or Nissan and used to whip the shit out of some punk. Hopefully I'll see some jerk walking down the sidewalk with the pattern of my former antenna welted across his face. That would rule.

Follow-up to Dealership Post

So I'm sure some of you have been sitting around thinking to yourself, "But Jarod, what happened with Herb Chambers?!" I'm happy to report that Hayley was able to successfully get her registration, inspection, and corrected odometer statement without trouble. And everyone was very nice and helpful, as well. Pretty much a complete 180 from the week leading up to it. Shocking!
Now what could have possibly caused this turn-about? Seems that the corporate office of HCH has joined my readership and sent a copy of Wednesday's post over to the GM at the dealership. As I actually thought possible, I'm betting they occasionally Google their name and see what comes up. Make sure no one is trashing them without reason. Or maybe I have a fan over there and never knew it!
To me, that sort of tainted their about-face. I was impressed and glad that the GM finally got involved and people stepped up to correct the problems that salesman Ron was causing. A big part of my frustration and anger with them was the fact that even as we explained what had been going on and were getting more and more jerked around, no one else showed any urgency to help us. Not even the sales manager seemed to care at all. Hell, no one even knew who was in the building on a day-to-day basis. We waited for 10 minutes on Wednesday while they paged Ron, who wasn't even working. We then witnessed a debate as to whether or not the finance guy was there. Way to be organized and know what the hell is going on around you.
Anyways...the fact that the corporate office called and probably read them the riot act means that they probably still could give 2 shits about us and their terrible service. They did what they did because their respective bosses told them to. So while the saga is finally over, neither of us ever wants to step foot in their dealership again. And I still can't recommend that anyone goes there. I've had dealing with 5 car dealerships in my life and this was the worst experience ever. And I haven't exactly had some good ones prior to this.
Whatever. I'm sure at least one person has had the same experience at every car dealership in the country. I guess it was just our turn to take one for the team.

Worst. Car Dealer. Ever.

Okay, time to vent a bit. So last week the wife buys a 2007 Honda Civic from Herb Chambers Honda here in Boston. Thursday night, to be exact. Even though they have a good reputation from people that have bought there, things were pretty bad from the start. Our salesman, Ron, was constantly dealing with other customers and/or issues while trying to sell us a car. And he either lied or was totally clueless about how the extended warranty works. But whatever, it was the right car at a good price and we shouldn't have to really deal with him much after that night. Right? Wrong. So she traded in her old car and wanted to just transfer the plates. On Friday when she picked up the car he said that they'd take care of all of it by Tuesday, Wednesday at the latest. The odometer statement was also wrong, but he said they'd have that fixed by Monday. Well here we are at 9pm on Wednesday night and guess what hasn't happened. We have no registration, inspection, odometer statement, insurance, etc, etc, etc. Ron has continued to lie to us and has yet to come through on anything commitment he's made. Doesn't matter what he said he'd do and by when, none of it has happened as promised. And yes, he totally hung us out to dry tonight again. Apparently by telling my wife "stop by this evening and we'll get everything straightened out and get you your registration" means that he'll be nowhere to be found and no one else in the dealership will have any idea of what's going on. Completely normal, right? It's been the most painful experience I've ever had with a car dealership, and I had a pretty bad one with a Subaru dealer a few years back. I thought watching those morons struggle to find the right paperwork and get it submitted correctly was pretty bad. These guys at Herb Chambers have blown them out of the water.
Right now I'm doing my best to not just step in front of Hayley and let them have it. She's on the mound right now and I will respect that. Until we get the car and we're done with them. Then I'll step up and make sure they know exactly how I feel about the events that have transpired. And since we're still not done there might be yet another chapter! But if it's not done by the time I get to volleyball tomorrow evening I am going to call them and rip someone a new asshole. So they have until about 6:30pm to do what they said they'd have done days ago before I lose it. Hayley won't launch into a profanity-filled tirade because she's a good person. I am not handicapped with such restraints.

Big Bargains on Idocy

So today I decided that with all my free time during the day I'd hit Costco when no one should be there. Turns out that I'm wrong. Not only are there lots of people there at 2pm on a Friday, but it attracts a ... certain kind of person. The idiots. And the old, but that's not their fault. And instead of most situations where they slowly sneak up on you when you least expect it and most require competency, this hit me right in the parking lot. It's amazing how many people can turn the simple act of guiding a car doing 10mph and putting it between 2 parallel lines into what seems like a Mensa quiz. Waiting for spots while someone loads their shit for 10 minutes instead of just parking 10 yards further from the door. Parking at some terrible angle and thus taking up 2 spots. Driving around aimlessly at 5mph looking for some mythical spot that whisks you instantly away to the inside of the store. Pretty aggravating. And it just got worse from there. Big shopping carts, endless choices and deals and things to consider, it's all way too much. So no, 2pm on a Friday is not a good time to go to Costco.

On a quick side note, watching "The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift" is another poor choice I've made so far today. And yet...here I am still watching it. Why? It's on, and Hayley's already in bed so I have to find quick ways to entertain myself. This is perfectly mind-numbing and can easily be done with little to no volume. I mean, this movie really is terrible. And I watch alot of terrible movies.

Quick show of hands; how many females watch the show "Two and a Half Men." Can't be many. So why are there so many commercials for feminine hygiene products and other distinctly female advertisements? I mean, really. There should be nothing more than beer and sports commercials.

Update: the movie just added a 67 Mustang fastback, almost my dream car. Right now I'm ignoring the fact that they dropped a Skyline engine in it and transformed it from a shell to a show-worthy race car in what couldn't have been more than a day and just enjoying it. What I wouldn't give to hear a tricked-out 289 with straight pipes under the hood instead.

Yeah, that's enough rambling for 1 night.
PEACE!!

"Game Changing Play" misnomer

Anyone that's been watching as much of the college bowl season as I have will have surely seen the promos for the Pontiac "Game Changing Play" contest. They list 5 plays to vote on and the popular winner wins. Here's my problem with it; all 5 plays were Touchdowns in the final seconds to win games. So while technically those plays changed the game in the sense that the game was decidedly different after the play, they're really game winning plays. Game changing plays are plays that happen in the middle of a game to dramatically shift the momentum. Usually no one scores on the play, but sometimes it's a pick-6, punt return, or huge offensive play. But it's not in the final seconds of a game; it's in the middle. Thus, you have both game winning and game changing plays.
But, understandably, true game changing plays are far less dramatic. It could be something as simple as a really big hit by a defender that turns a game around. That isn't nearly as media friendly as a miraculous TD pass to win a game as time expires.

I'm sure many of you have heard me complain about the companies in the world that have managed to reach into my brain and steal my unpublished ideas for their own benefit. Like how George Foreman made serious cash on my idea of using the top of a toaster oven to toast bread while I'm cooking a chicken breast in it. Tostitos has managed to do it again. As Hayley constantly kids me about, I have a tendancy to create elaborate imaginary scenarios after coming up with a humorous observation. I won't go into any examples right now, mostly cause I can't think of any. So in the commercial you see a guy standing in the chip aisle looking at bags of Tostitos scoops while we hear his internal dialog. After determining that the chips are like food luggage, he then creates a situation where he has an imaginary conversation with an imaginary person about his "food luggage". Normally I'd just see it as a funny commercial. But after having Hayley kid me about my little habit so much and make me hyper-aware of it, I can know clearly see that They have stolen my ideas once again. Who are "They"? I'm not real sure. But someone is clearly tapping into my inner thoughts and using them for profit without sharing a dime with me. Are they using satelites? Maybe they implanted a transmitter into my body during my last surgery which can tap into my brain signals and relay them to a transmission tower. I'm not sure. But what I am sure about is that I need to start sending them false thoughts. Throw them off in directions they don't want to be in. Like...hamburger earmuffs!

My new full-time job

I know, I know. It's been even longer this time than normal. But I have a good excuse! For those that don't know (which is probably 90% of you since I'm apparently very bad at informing people of stuff), I got laid-off from Teradyne back in mid-November. After surviving some 15 or so lay offs, including 2 earlier in 2008, I finally ended up on the wrong project at the wrong time. So instead of spending a few hours a week trying to look for a better job and having to make up excuses as to what I'm doing on interview trips, TER is now paying me to stay home and do it full time! And as a bonus, I have plenty of time to work on projects around the house and goof off every day.
However, while it didn't really bother me at first, turns out it did. While I wanted to leave anyways, it's a bit insulting to have a company that's leeching money so quickly to tell you you're not good enough to work for them any more. Especially with some of the jerks that got kept (No, not you, Tom)! I know that this wasn't a performance-based layoff, but it still hurt. Couple that with the fact that no one is hiring in December this year, and it sucked. Tough to keep your head up when you can't even get interviews anywhere.
But like a Christmas gift from the universe, things seem to finally be turning around. Got a couple interviews and know of a few things that should be opening up in January/February. Not sure if anything is going to end up being the job I'm looking for, but at least things are happening finally.

In brighter news, we're well in the heart of bowl season. I'm watching Northwestern take on Mizzou right now. Not a power-house match up here, but it's been a pretty good game. And because Northwestern is not only a fellow BigTen school, but also the home-town college for me, I have a vested interest in the game.
And with bowl season comes my week+ of horrible eating. For dinner tonight I've so far had 8 buffalo wings, a bowl of New York Cheddar and Herb Kettle Cooked potato chips (no that isn't unnecessary detail!), and now I'm eating chips and salsa. And a "few" beers. And tomorrow I have 3 more excuses to keep doing it! Not until 4pm, so I'll have to be productive in the morning and afternoon.

Now I'm sure everyone is reading this and wondering what I got for Christmas. I am the center of y'all's universe for crap sake! While there were many awesome gifts, the cornerstone of this year's crop is Rock Band 2 for our Wii. Unfortunately I haven't quite rocked out here at home. The drums are being UPS'ed as we speak, and I had a job interview this afternoon. I pretty much knew that there was a non-zero chance of me calling to reschedule the interview if I started rocking out today. So instead I'll just wait until Hayley goes to bed shortly and set it all up. Seems to be the perfect activity to try and do quietly while getting drunk. Am I right, people?!!

So until next time I'll just be sitting here at home living off of my fairly generous severance package and unemployment insurance. Have fun at work suckers!

Man vs Survivorman

Most people are at least aware of the 2 major survival shows on televsion; "Survivorman" and "Man vs. Wild". Many of those have watched at least an episode or 2 of either of them. Most of you that read this are also aware that my father and I do a remote wilderness camping trip in Canada every summer for 2 weeks. So you'd think that I'd be over-joyed that there are 2 shows that could be covering some important skills for us. But in the words of the immortal Lee Corso: "Not so fast!!"
Let me quickly get the non-viewers up to speed, while also prepping for where this is going. Survivorman is done by Les Stroud. He takes a few cameras and a couple basic things like a Leatherman tool and heads to remote areas around the globe with the intention of surviving for 7 days. Essentially he's mimicking the infamous "worst case scenario" of any trip to a remote locale. But he's out there all alone with his cameras and no help. "Man vs. Wild" is done by Bear Grylls. Bear takes a camera crew with him to remote locations and does incredible stunts and has wild adventures for a day or 2.
In 2004 when I first saw the trailer for Survivorman I was pysched. Here was a survival expert heading to a similar area and a similar time to when we do our camping trips. And it lived up to it's billing. I picked up quite a few little tricks we could use in the event of an accident. How to start fires correctly with just bark and sticks, what types of things you can eat, how to correctly set up shelter, etc. But the best part to me was that it was realistic. He's not doing anything you wouldn't really do if you were in a life-and-death situation. Namely, no unnecessary risks.
Bear does his show in the exact opposite way. While he's also trying to survive an extreme situation, he does non-stop risky things to create drama. Some things he does are good, but it's not realistic overall. But when you have a camera crew following you around and you're only out for 1 or 2 days you can do that. I know, Les apparently has a crew nearby that he checks in with every day, but they do not intervene in anyway during his week.
We've been very fortunate to have never gotten into any bad situations, although not without some pretty close calls. And there's only so much you can do to avoid that. What you can do is listen to the ranger when you go in and do what they tell you to. (Quick primer: We go into the Quetico Park. You stop at 1 of 6 entry stations to pay your fees and check-in and get some quick updates. What are the water levels like, any new dangers, accidents, fires, etc. We've then proceeded to go 7 days without seeing another human being on some trips. Typically it's 2 or 3 days b/t sightings, and even then it's typically just the glint of the sun off a canoe on the other side of the lake.) And yes, people that don't follow basic safety instructions don't always come back. ~4 years ago a guy drowned not 2 miles from where we typically camp. So I do know that if Bear actually tried to do most of things he does in a real survive situation he wouldn't last long. There are times when extreme measures are required, but certainly not on day 1 or 2. Climbing a rocky waterfall instead of hiking for an hour to get around it? Wreckless and stupid. Swimming under a log jam of unknown size in a canyon? Also stupid. These are the types of stunts that get people killed. When you're out there all alone a badly sprained ankle could be all it takes. Or a deep cut. A concussion. Any number of seemingly small injuries suddenly become a situation. And with all the dangers we face on our trips, that's what scares us most. Bears, violent thunderstorms, high winds, all have nothing on a simple sprain or infection.
In short, anyone that does outdoor activities should take the time to watch at least a few episodes of Survivorman. While the specific situation may not apply every time, the skills he uses are typically the same. Stay dry, stay warm, find food and water. The more ways you know how to do those things, the better your odds of survival are.

Winter Doth Approach

This year's World Series was actually pretty enjoyable for me. But still nowhere near the WS's of yore. I did really enjoy seeing a couple teams play small-ball and do the fundamentals in order to win. And every games except for 1 was right down to the wire. But I really just didn't care all that much about who won. I'm thrilled to see the title come back to the NL where it belongs, but I had no real connection to the Phillies. Good or bad. And nothing for the Rays except the knowledge that it's good for baseball to see a small market team full of kids make it to the show. Each of the last 5 years or so I've had either a team I liked, a team I hated, or some other great sub-plot to draw me in. Something at stake. This one? Not so much. So while I did enjoy watching the games, I felt no compulsion to stay up late to see who won each game and now I have kind of an empty feeling inside. Couple this with the fact that Purdue's football team is getting beat pretty much every week and not being able to watch hardly any Bears games, and I'm hitting a lull. The teams that are doing well I can't see; the teams that aren't I can. It's not fair.

In happier news, last weekend I finally used a 2-year old birthday gift from Hayley and went up for my "Discovery Flight" in a Cessna. It was really cool. I show up at the airport and spend a few minutes talking to the pilot about my background in regards to flying, what I want to do, and how the day will go. Then we stroll out to the plane and hop in. It was surprisingly cramped. Turns out a Cessna 172 doesn't have much room in the cockpit. Who knew?! I then got to taxi pretty much all the way from the hanger to the runway. It's actually a bit tricky to do. You can't use the steering wheel to do anything. It's all done by the foot pedals and a bit hard to get the hang of. Then pretty much as soon as we were off the ground he turned the controls over to me again. He guided me out to a safe area where we wouldn't interfere with planes coming and going and just tooled around a bit. I was much less aggressive than I thought I'd be. We had quite a bit of turbulence to deal with and the plane was quite responsive. So all the jostling and bouncing around took away a bit of my eagerness to really play around. He then let me bring it almost all the way in before taking control just long enough to touch it down. All in all, pretty awesome. And now I'm thinking seriously about getting my license. Trouble is it'd cost about $10k over the span of a couple months to get it. That's a tough pill to swallow right now. Even so, I've already thought about the possibilities of renting a plane to fly to Chicago for trips instead of relying on the major carriers. Or when we have to go to Long Island, that's just a 45-minute flight instead of a 4+ hour drive! Nice.
And with that, time to drift off to bed.
PEACE!!

2008 Campaign

I think something good has happened this election season. As much as I hate the election process we have in this country, I wanted to point it out. After having to sit through 2 elections where the republicans were forced to dance around every issue to protect Bush, we finally seem to be getting into real national-level issues in the debates. Talk on how we’re going to handle the 2 non-wars we’re involved in. Foreign relations with our current enemies and countries liable to become enemies if they aren’t handled appropriately. Details on the 2 candidates proposed tax systems. Turning around our sputtering economy.
During both of Bush’s campaigns it appeared that they had to talk about random crap to try and get an edge. Bush couldn’t speak intelligently on the standard things like the economy and foreign relations, so they had to fight about stem cell research and the place of God in schools. Essentially, moral issues that only affect a small population. And while I feel that some of those things are issues that could be used to select a candidate, they most certainly should not be the key issues.
Everyone has their own personal reasons for voting a certain way. We all have key points that we want reflected in our President. But there comes a time when you have to ask yourself if your reasons are selfish. You have to look at all the things a candidate stands for and decide where you need to make your compromises, and hopefully those compromises are the selfish reasons. The republicans have been very effective at getting people to do the opposite. They really convince people that you need to vote based on personal, moral issues instead of what’s best for our country. Hell, they got people to elect a President that crippled our economy and indirectly caused thousands of people to be brutally killed in the name of some petty moral issues.
So fortunately this election has so far been mostly free of that crap. Joe the Plumber was hopefully nothing more than a flash-in-the-pan hot button McCain used to avoid going 0-3 in the debates. The talk of the candidates’ former associates has been touched on here and there, but has been over-shadowed by more legit issues.
Living in Massachusetts comes with some ups and downs during these elections. One of the more frustrating issues comes from this being a clear Democrat state. There is no way a Republican could ever take the state. Therefore, my vote doesn’t really count here. I can’t really influence who wins, just pad numbers one way or the other. That sucks. As empowering as voting can be, it’s taken away when you know you can’t make a real difference. However, the up side is that I don’t have to put the same level of thought into my vote as I would in a swing state. And this year appears to be one where some thought would be required. I’m 75% sure of who would be the better President, but both sides have some policies that I really don’t like.
Obama’s tax plan is starting to worry me more and more. It sounds awesome on paper. 95% of the population won’t see an increase in tax (35% of which aren’t paying any to begin with). I probably stand to make out a bit better under his plan. And yes, the rich make more so they could be asked to chip in more. But is that really right? Some of those people fought and struggled to get where they are and deserve what they now have. Why should we take away a greater percentage of what they earn? Was America really founded on the idea that we all share everything we make? Hells no!! The founding fathers were all rich white guys that horded their money and never dreamed of having to give 50% of every dollar back to government. Shit, they would have left Britain in control if they knew that’s where we’d be today.
And why should Joe the plumber have to chip in more when he’s only making a quarter of a million dollars a year?! I mean, how can he afford to eat on only $250k/yr?!!

Ahh, that familiar sting of defeat

I had a venting write-up of games 1 and 2 of the Cubs NLDS all ready to go, but I never posted it and now it's pretty much a moo point. (no that's not a typo, figure it out if you want.) The Cubs completely fell apart and were swept by the Dodgers. And not in competitive fashion. They got beat like a red-headed step child riding a rented mule. They got Rodney King beat. They got...you get the picture.
Right now it's more shock for me. I'm mostly through my newly formed traditional bottle of champagne, which is taking the sting out of things tonight. After feeling like I jinxed the Cubs in 2003 by buying a bottle of champagne mid-playoffs, I decided that I'll now buy a bottle at the start of every season, then consume said bottle after the final out is recorded. If we win, it's a celebratory bottle. If not, I get what I have right now. Something tasty and bubbly to let the healing begin. And this is no sparkling white wine. I only want the best no matter how the season goes down.
Quite frankly, the Cubs got beat in every facet of the game. They allowed their starting pitching to lose game 1, their defense to lose game 2, and their (lack of) timely hitting to lose game 3. It's almost poetic in it's futility. And in some ways, the non-competitiveness of the games made them easier to take. It's not like game 6 of the 2003 NLCS where we were cruising along 5-outs away from our first World Series appearance since 1945 and then collapsed. No no, we were never really in the first 2 games. We were winning for a couple innings in game 1, but that was quickly fixed and the Dodgers never looked back. The last lead we had was the going into the top of the 5th in game 1. That's it. Last time. Not even close in game 2, and while we were close on the scoreboard in game 3, you could tell that it wasn't close on the field. We wasted every opportunity given to us. Any brief flicker of hope was extinguished by our futility. The Dodgers didn't beat us; we beat ourselves. In spectacular fashion.
I can't believe we actually hit 100 years. And I really thought this would be the year we did it. I allowed myself to believe again. All year long I thought that this would be it. And now I have to admit I'm not sure that we'll ever win it all again. I really hurts enough that I'm doubting things that much. It's even hard to blame it on the curse this time. There wasn't 1 or 2 moments that you can look back on and say that the curse got us. Maybe the curse was especially strong this year and forced the entire system to fail. I don't know.
And as far as I can tell, this whole October baseball thing is very over-rated. It's been nothing but pain for me in my life. Swept in the 1st round this year and last year. The painful and well-documented collapse in 2003. The beating from Atlanta in 1998. Luckily I don't remember 1984 and 1989, or this would be even worse! I guess it comes down the great debate: Is it better to have loved and lost or to have never loved at all? And while I can't answer that right now, I should be able to give a good answer in about 56 weeks. I mean, we've got most of our starting rotation returning, some great young hitters coming up through the system, and lots of great young arms that gained experience this year. Next year, baby. Next year is going to be the one. I can feel it already.